Day 28: “Something that you miss”
Right now there are so many things I miss, I don’t know where to begin. Earlier this week, while attempting to fix my external hard drive, I reformatted it, wiping all the information off of it. As soon as that was finished, and I mean, the moment it finished, my computer froze up, and then would not boot up again. So after always having everything backed up all the time, in the exact minute I no longer had anything backed up, my computer decided to tweak the hell out.
I’m going to try the recommended software this weekend to see if I can salvage anything from my computer’s hard drive, and then take it in to be fixed. But right now it looks like everything from the last eight years is gone. Everything from my 20s is likely gone. I can get the music again, though it will take time, and luckily I always email my writing to myself, (plus in general, drafts of it get emailed so much that I can find recent enough drafts to salvage it) but unless one of these programs works, all my pictures will be gone. And that is the heart breaker.
All my pictures from my three years in Los Angeles (including tons from my years at IO West and the first year of UCBTLA), my only solo backpacking trip through Europe, my college graduation, my first five years with my guy, my guy’s first time ever leaving the United States, and the first time I saw my father in 15 years could all be gone. That is what I am missing right now. The one picture I see in my mind over and over again is of my father’s arm, where he had my name tattooed on it. He died two years ago. The idea of losing that picture, and so many of the others, is heartbreaking to me. Right now I see it in my mind but I know that will fade.
I haven’t given up hope yet, but not being ale to just walk over and access these things means I already miss them. I don’t care if I get nothing else off but the pictures. Please work. Pretty please. I miss sitting at my desk. Sitting on my sofa with my guy’s laptop just isn’t the same. Just the pictures. Give me the pictures. That’s all I really need.